About Me

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Hi. You found me. Thanks for clicking over! Sit and stay awhile..... This is the view from my window... As I move around my little valley I call 'home,' I've had many different views & this is the one that I keep coming back to.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Week 4: Feb. 22-27

This was (finally) my first full week at my site. After arriving on Wednesday, I attended my first daily staff meeting. During these meetings, the Child Life specialists note which of their patients needs a volunteer and who can go to the playroom or the classroom. This is an important part of keeping each person in the CL department updated on all of the many patients that are at the hospital. The meeting moved quickly and I was easily confused by all of the medical and specific terms the women used. After the meeting, I was able to ask my supervisor questions about what happened and then we started rounds on her floors.

Just like I was last Friday, I was a little unsure about entering patients' rooms. My supervisor works so confidently and quickly, that I find myself easily confused by the terms and events that occur. After holding my questions for awhile, I slowly started asking about confusing aspects of the job. By asking questions and speaking up when something strange or confusing happened, I am quickly learning a lot of new things about Child Life and the hospital.

Also, like I mentioned in class yesterday, I have been doing a lot of walking! It may seem like a silly thing to note, but after two full days at my site, I realized that I need to get some better shoes! In order to cover all of the patients that are under her care, my supervisor has to walk over two floors and is constantly on the go. Because of this, I keep getting confused about where rooms are and where patients that we have visited are located! My supervisor is really understanding and helpful with this.

Sometimes I think I look a little lost because she'll smile and start explaining what just happened or where a certain room is. Because of our improving communication, I have been learning many new things, and my confidence has been growing. At the beginning of the week, I was overwhelmed and was questioning my intentions of going into CL but now I am excited and I am slowly building up my confidence. Also, because I am not considered an official intern in CL at the hospital, I am only supposed to observe. However, each time my supervisor asks me to do something small, my confidence builds and I get more excited!

So I say thank you for the music, the song I'm singing

I love you God!

Thank you for the sunshine!

You sure know how to make a girl happy and grin from ear to ear
(and desperately want to take a nap in a sun filled bedroom
-that she never gets to be in during the best nap times of the afternoon :)


Headed off to bed.

Been a long, hard week.

Been a long, hard weekend.

Need (and almost coveting) sleep right now.

Thanks God for the great lessons you are teaching me!
The Song of Solomon series at church is something I recognize that I have heard before,
but I am totally loving it and I desperately need to hear it again!

Thanks for the laughter, tears, and crazy stories to share with my best friend in the world (& she just happens to be my roommate- lucky me!). Help me to trust, honor, and respect her like I should.

Love you God!

Never thought I would....

but I am loving this song by Needtobreathe! Yep, surprised myself :) It's not that I don't like them, I just don't love them. I think the guitar is awesome and I want to learn how to play it so that has a lot to do with it too:) Anyways, here is the song:

Something Beautiful by NeedToBreathe

In your ocean, I'm ankle deep
I feel the waves crashin' on my feet
It's like I know where I need to be
But I can't figure out, yeah I can't figure out

Just how much air I will need to breathe
When your tide rushes over me
There's only one way to figure out
Will ya let me drown, will ya let me drown

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

And the water is risin' quick
And for years I was scared of it
We can't be sure when it will subside
So I won't leave your side, no I can't leave your side

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

In a daydream, I couldn't live like this
I wouldn't stop until I found something beautiful
When I wake up, and all I want, I have
You know its still not what I need
Something beautiful

Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, 'cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I'm in reach
'Cause I am down on my knees, I'm waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful

Friday, February 26, 2010

Church Answers

Jesus. God. The Bible. Pray.

I'm tired of giving the church answers.

Tired of getting myself stuck in a rut.

When I find myself giving church answers or simply reverting to knowledge (and not thinking),
that is when I search.
I read my Bible,
I pray to God,
asking him to help me live like Jesus did, striving to live a life of purpose and meaning.

I guess I really can't get away from them :)

Wednesday, February 24, 2010


Rice Krispy Treats & flume rides. what a random Wednesday

Thee Day (as in threeve wo/the 'r' & 've' + as in neighbor and way):

-Early morning headed to internship
-raining/drizzling very windy & cold
-Windows fogged until after 10 min. of driving to northernmost part of Fresno. Ah!
-held a baby without touching him (?)
-ran around in circles
-questioned my future
-excited about my future
-scurried to school
-pb&j .........that's how I roll. always & forever. I'll have them at my wedding. jk. no. really, jk.
-chat w/sister
-Easter vacation plans?! Excited!
-study! study! study! for intense test
-test! not so intense after all.
-chat w/prof.
-slow drive home (prayed for yesterday's accident on Ashlan)
-honey, I'm home!!
-chat w/the girl
-fancast -love it!
-fancast....more :)
-eating dinner
-Oh the joy! Oh the wonderful, wonderful food!
-change into comfy clothes
-take trash out
-wikipedia'd actors
-the girl returned
-more wikipedia....fashion schools & designers
-interviewed oldest & (real) oldest sisters for a paper
-made Rice Krispy Treats
-yelled "Rice Krispy Treat me!" when I needed to urgently mix cereal w/mallows :)
-interviewed barely older sister
-wikipedia'd malls, amusement parks, & flume rides?! so random!
-smile.................that was a good day

(to soon follow)

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Striving Daily

Trying to live by this verses every day:

Produce fruit in keeping with repentance.

This verse teaches me to produce fruit in my life by actively living for God, as a repentant person, aware of my sinful heart.


. The axe is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire.
What should we do then?" the crowd asked.
. John answered, "The man with two tunics should share with him who has none, and the one who has food should do the same."
Tax collectors also came to be baptized. "Teacher," they asked, "what should we do?"
. "Don't collect any more than you are required to," he told them.
Then some soldiers asked him, "And what should we do?"
. He replied, "Don't extort money and don't accuse people falsely—be content with your pay."

These verses teach me: generosity, to not be stingy, and to be content with my resources- not wanting more or being greedy with money.

Week 3: Feb. 15 - 20

Yesterday I attended my facility orientation where we reviewed hospital rules, HIPPA laws, and the codes that are used at the hospital. This part was somewhat boring because I already knew about confidentiality. Some of the codes they use at the hospital are very serious and life threatening (health alarms, bomb threats, etc.) which definitely reminded me that being in the hospital environment can be a very serious thing. However, the orientation speaker said that a code pink (child abduction or kidnapping) usually doesn't even refer to patients. She said that most of the time, little (toddler) brother or sisters of a patient will become distracted by something and walk away from their parents who will then need help finding them. This reminded me that although children can be cute with their endless curiosity, sometimes they can be frustrating!

After attending my orientation, I met with my supervisor. She explained to me again that because the CL department in is a time of transition, I will need to be very flexible and patient. Next we went to the PICU and checked on a few of the children there without any parents or visitors. One boy had to get an x-ray taken. After my supervisor asked a nurse if he would need her, she said that 'no, he seems fine.' I noticed quickly that my supervisor was very persistent in her questions, continuing to ask different questions and in different ways.* I hope that I can be persistent and assertive regarding the care of my patients if I do go into this profession in the future. I know that I am not always as vocal as I should be in standing up for myself, so I hope I can learn this skill.* Even after talking to the nurse, my supervisor went to check on him and talk to his mom. He became very upset once the x-ray machine arrived. Because there wasn't much time, my supervisor could not calm the boy down enough to lay still so she had to hold him down so they could take it. Once we left the room, she explained to me that sometimes if there isn't time, her last resort is to help restrain a child instead of having the parent do it. She explained that the parent is already the 'bad guy' at home and she didn't want a parent to be in that situation while the patient was at the hospital. This resonated with me and definitely got me thinking about the parent-child relationship.

After that, we walked down to a room where a baby was barely waking up. My supervisor said that he didn't have many visitors and that he could really benefit from being held. After putting on the protective scrub smock, mask, and gloves, I sat down to hold him. It was a little tricky at first because he was hooked up to oxygen tubes and blood pressure wires, but then he settled down. It was funny because he didn't like the wires so he kept moving them, but then after awhile he fell asleep. Although it was a little alarming to have to wear so many things to protect myself from whatever he was sick with, it was fun to just hold him and talk to him for a few hours. He seemed like such a sweet little baby and it was sad for me to realize that his nurse was probably his only visitor. I fed him and then held him until he fell asleep.

Before I left my supervisor kept thanking me for being with the baby for such a long time. She told me that if she has spare time, it is one of the most rewarding things for her to just sit and hold a baby who needs to be loved on which I readily agreed with. I know that most days will not be as quiet and easy as yesterday was, but I'm ready and willing to keep learn and observing!

Week 2: Feb. 7 - 13

Blog from week 2:

After getting all of my required information turned in, I am finally going to be able to attend my clinical orientation class this upcoming Friday. After some initial frustration, I am excited to jump in and learn a lot about Child Life (CL) at my site: Children's Hospital Central California (located in Madera).

This week, I was able to talk to my site supervisor about my learning objectives and I am excited to get to work! Previously I job shadowed a Child Life specialist who is actually now my site supervisor. While discussing my learning objectives, I realized that I will now be involved in many areas of the hospital that I have never visited before when I shadowed the CL specialist previously. This is exciting to me because I will be experiencing and learning so many new things.

Also, I learned what I will actually be doing while at my site. By doing some reading and research, I will be learning about Child Life, what the profession is, and what it entails in a children's hospital. I will also be learning about developmental stages of children and how they are present in the hospital. I'm excited about this because I will be able to apply some things I have learned in previous classes in a clinical setting. Also, I'm excited to begin my internship while I'm taking my theories class. I hope that I will be able to learn firsthand how each one of the 'grand theories' are evident in children. In addition, I will be observing and learning about what procedural teaching is and how to implement it in a hospital. I'm excited about explaining to children what IV's, Pic lines, and other things that may seem scary in a hospital are used for.

I will also be learning about play, distraction, and other tools to help children learn about and cope with their hospital experience. By observing other CL specialists, I hope to learn what tools to implement in similar situations in the future. After being able to help a CL specialist with implementing these strategies in my previous visits while job shadowing, I am excited to learn even more by observing from a clinical perspective.

One of the other things I will be doing is observing and implementing information I will be learning in the classroom and playroom. I am really excited about this because I was not able to visit these areas the previous times I was at the hospital. After talking to my supervisor, I think that this is probably where I will be doing the bulk of my work on a project for my site. I think that I might be working on developing play plans (a sort of schedule of lessons) for children of all ages and developmental stages. This should be an exciting and interesting process of integrating the concepts I will be learning in tangible ways.

After taking my orientation class next Friday, I hope to have new information to share about my experiences at the hospital. Although the orientation will mainly focus on hospital facility and employee standards, I am excited to get started and learn the basics about being a hospital employee so that I can jump into the field of Child Life.


I am doing an internship at Children's Hospital Central California this semester as a part of the requirement for my major in Child Development. As a part of the course, we are required to blog each week about what we did, what we learned, and our thoughts about our sites.
Therefore, I have decided to post my blogs from that on here!

Here is the first entry:

Week 1: Jan. 31 - Feb. 6
At the end of my first week of my internship, I find myself excited for the future but also frustrated with my present situation. To begin my internship in Child Life at Children’s Hospital Central California, I have to complete various steps so that I can even be at the site. After contacting my site supervisor, she was finally able to put me in touch with the correct person to complete my initial paperwork and qualifications to be interning. This woman schedules the clinical orientations for those interning at the hospital (for nursing and Child Life). After sending her proof of all of my immunizations and my TB test, I discovered that I needed to complete a few more things. Needless to say, after many trips to the health center at school, I will be cleared soon to attend an orientation.
However, after I found out last week that I cannot attend an orientation until the 19th (of February), I was quite upset. I feel frustrated as I wait to complete all of the necessary steps so that I can even be at my site. When I was at the hospital this week to turn in some papers, the woman in charge of orientation was quite firm and almost scolded me as she told me that until I had all of my immunizations completed and an updated TB test turned in, I was not even allowed to be talking to my site supervisor in any way or to be at the hospital. This was especially frustrating because she did not tell me I needed an updated TB test until after I had asked her (which I mistakenly assumed she would check on). Therefore, after I had gone to the health center for the first time, I had to go back the very next day to get an updated test. Although I was taken aback by her harsh words, I quickly informed her that I have taken care of everything and I should be able to attend the soonest orientation.
In the end, although the initial stages of my internship have been frustrating, I am excited for what is to come. While at the hospital last week, my supervisor told me a little bit about the process of my internship and what areas of the hospital I will be involved in. I’m excited about eventually getting to work at my site and I’m eager to see what I have to share next week!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

maybe...in the future

Just a little message I sent to the sister today:

I hope to see this at your house someday.

Look at all the wee little rainbows! Ohmygosh! So precious!

Spiritual Gifts

And to keep the ball rolling from my hiatus of posting,
here's a comment:

I never thought I would see that day that I would like a song by Train.
Weird name for a musical group, I know. Like, what are they? Conductors. Ugh. my Dad's corniness should not be one of my spiritual gifts. But oh well, it is what it is. Bam. That just happened!

ANYways, here are the lyrics (to the song I don't really even understand)!

Hey, hey

Your lipstick stains on the front lobe of my left side brains . . {love that line!}
I knew I wouldn't forget you, and so I went and let you blow my mind
Your sweet moonbeam, the smell of you in every single dream I dream
I knew when we collided, you're the one I have decided who's one of my kind

Hey soul sister, ain't the Mr. Mister on the radio, stereo, the way you move ain't fair, you know!
Hey soul sister, I don't want to miss a single thing you do...tonight
Hey, hey

Just in time, I'm so glad you have a one-track mind like me
You gave my life direction, a game show love connection we can't deny
I'm so obsessed, my heart is bound to beat right out my untrimmed chest
I believe in you, like a virgin, you're Madonna, and I'm always gonna wanna blow your mind

Hey soul sister, ain't that Mr. Mister on the radio, stereo, the way you move ain't fair, you know!
Hey soul sister, I don't want to miss a single thing you do...tonight

The way you can't cut a rug, watching you's the only drug I need
You're so gangsta, I'm so thug, you're the only one I'm dreaming of
You see, I can be myself now finally, in fact there's nothing I can't be
I want the world to see you be with me

Hey soul sister, ain't that Mr. Mister on the radio, stereo, the way you move ain't fair, you know!
Hey soul sister, I don't want to miss a single thing you do tonight,
Hey soul sister, I don't want to miss a single thing you do...tonight
Hey, hey

Hey, hey


Numero Ochenta

Wow- this number definitely came quickly after my fiftieth!
Woop! Go me!

Okay, enough about me.
(Well not really :)

The reason I haven't really been posting lately (well for quite awhile now. almost TWO weeks- geez it's been awhile!) is because, simply put, my life has become A LOT busier than when I was posting like crazy in January and in the wee small hours of February. (Name that song anyone?) After the semester started, I became really busy with school and everything it entails (work! finally! I was so bored without it!, homework, reading, going to class, etc.).

Needless to say, I have been busy with other stuff too and now I just don't have as much time to procrastinate for hours on end on the internet. Which sadly includes blogging. But I must point out, my time blogging is really only limited to this particular blog. Which is frustratingly so.
This semester, I have to blog or keep up with blogs of my classmates each week. Which has taken its toll on my excitement to blog on here as well.

I am still working through some things with God (isn't everyone- all the time? :), thinking about, praying about, and dealing with some things with Him. They are mostly all good, or rather, positive things, but I am working through them nonetheless. And one of them is my winter blues (which usually come in January and February). And another is the realization of the way I have been spending my time lately. I would argue that the time I spend blogging here is usually productive and positive for me (because I usually turn towards positive reflection & such things), but
I have realized lately how much time I use my computer and more specifically the internet to procrastinate and waste my time with. I realize this and I'm working on it, but that is just another reason I haven't been writing.

I guess another big reason is that I simply haven't felt like it. I have never been a person to do something every day and commit to spending the same amount of time doing said thing every. single. day. (in a row) So I am okay with this. However, I have missed writing. I feel that God has truly blessed me with this area and time as a niche for reflection and jotting down random blurbs of feeling, emotion, and for writing about the things that excite/depress/anger/thrill/and intrigue me.

Along with using my computer and the internet to waste my time, I have become increasingly aware of how much time my sister and I devote to staring at our computer screens. At times, we are even sitting next to each other! I know that this time of using the internet is not always wasteful, but I have noticed lately how badly I just want to close my computer and talk. Most of the blogs I gravitate towards include stories. I want to read about a person's life. Learn. And know them. And most of the time, it is fun to do that with strangers, or with people I am barely connected to. To learn about the unknown, hear someone's trials, rejoice with their delights, and learn from their mistakes. This is why I treasure these types of blogs. In a way, I started out this blog to do just that. To write my own thoughts, feelings, experiences and stories down. To share my history with other people, to hold myself accountable, and to share what God is doing in my life. However, although He has done interesting things through this blog, I have definitely been noticing lately how poorly I have been managing my time lately. And a lot of that is a result of the things I have already mentioned.

So if you're reading this (and I'm really only talking to Rach bc I'm pretty -100%- sure that you're the only person who reads this), please know that I am doing what I intended. I have been writing about things in my life, holding myself accountable on some important things, and sharing what God has been doing in my life. However, when I realized how often I was seeking a story on someone's blog, and that slowly started to include my sister, I realize my mistake and what I need to work on. I mean, come on! Last year I liked to read her sporadic posts because I didn't usually hear about what she posted. But now I live with her! I can get info from her and her a story from her life any time I want to!

All this is to say, I'm sorry. and thank you. (What movie/tv show is that from? Seriously- it's bugging me!)
No really, I guess I'm sorry I haven't been blogging in a way, but thank you blog for helping me learn about myself and ways in which I need to change.
The end.

Thursday, February 4, 2010


Putting it out there.

Goal: learn how to play these songs.

The Kingdom- Bethany Dillon
A Voice Calling Out- Bethany Dillon
No Not One- Brandon Heath
Revelation Song- Kari Jobe
All I Need- Bethany Dillon
No Sweeter Name- Kari Jobe
Beautiful- Bethany Dillon
Hallelujah- Bethany Dillon
For My Love- Bethany Dillon
Hallelujah- 10th Avenue North
Before the Throne- Shane & Shane
Save Me- JJ Heller
Only Have One- JJ Heller
All I Need- JJ Heller
Love Never Fails- Brandon Heath
Listen Up- Brandon Heath

Woke up

I woke up with this song in my head. And it's a good one at that!

"A Voice Calling Out"

I hear a voice calling out
I hear a voice in this wilderness
Where darkness has reigned for so long
Ground is being taken

The trumpet sounds
And Your glory touches the ground
And we all stand in awe
Who is this?
This glory far beyond us
I hear a voice

I hear a drum beating
heaven's drawing near
The sky will open
Your people are being healed
I hear a voice

Heaven's battle cry
See the sun light what was hidden
Heaven's heart beat
See is moving
What was a whisper is now
A voice calling out

I see a generation rising up
No longer accepting lies
Running to the battlefield
And losing their lives

I see a generation rising up
No longer accepting lies
As a band of worshipers run to the battlefield
They're finding their lives
I hear a voice

Tuesday, February 2, 2010


Crazy busy day.

Lots of
phone calls,
places to go,
people to talk to,
running around with my head cut off.

But God is certainly good.
Most (if not all) things were taken care of,
people were contacted,
sister made me a sammie to chomp down on the way to work (yep- already not doing to good on my goal to be a better driver),
and I just kept receiving exciting and encouraging news right after each other!

Thank you Lord for an awesome sister who is intrigued by food enough
to find and make uh-mazing meals for us!
Seriously! Thank you Lord for good flavors, yummy food & for taste buds!

Thank you Lord for an encouraging day!
Please guide me in my decisions of what to spend my time on.
You know what that means (worry, hesitancy, & excitement),
what I can handle,
and what I should do.

Thank you for the blessings you have given me.
Reading over my last post, I realize just how many friendships I have made just in the last year and it is astounding! I have spoken with, joked with, and gotten to know some interesting and amazing people that I never thought I would have ever met!
Thank you Lord for those opportunities & lessons.
Please help my witness to still shine through & show me ways I can renew those seeds I hoped to have planted!

And please help me to have self control to actually go to bed earlier tomorrow(er-tonight)!

Monday, February 1, 2010


Let the Waters Rise

Brandon Heath:
Love Never Fails
Listen Up


Tenth Avenue North: